Cyrus is almost 3 months old and boy is he getting big! I think it was really the 2 month mark where things started to really fall into place. I felt back to my normal self, we started getting into a rough routine and Cyrus started looking more like a chubby baby and less like a little raisin. It also helped a lot that he started smiling and laughing! Now I would do anything to eke a toothless grin out of his little chubby face.
There was just one problem: I picked up a lot more hours at work. Most of the time I am a WAHM. I work from home for the construction company my husband and I own, but I also teach fitness classes a couple times a week. Fitness is my passion and I love getting out of the house and pushing others to work out hard but with a newborn things get complicated.
The first issue was finding reliable child care. My boss was kind enough to share her sitter with me one day a week and my husband takes care of the baby when I teach on the weekends but I needed to find my own child care for one afternoon when my boss doesn't use the sitter, and my husband is working. The first week I found a friend to help me out, but last week I was scrambling up to the last minute to find help and of course I didn't feel good leaving my baby with just anyone...
The other issue is that it still takes me about 30 min to get ready before I go anywhere (and that is still after I have showered, put on make up and brushed my teeth). I find myself spending my time making sure Cyrus has everything he needs: a few bottles of breast milk, a change of clothes, plenty of diapers and wipes. I also need to make sure I have snacks for myself (man, breastfeeding makes you hungry), my phone, wallet and breastfeeding cover or carrier if I need it. I also have to change Cyrus and get him settled in his car seat (which he hates) and I dread the day when he can fight to get out of it. Once I have done all that and packed up the car, my new slower driving style adds about 15 minutes to my commute so there go 45 minutes, just to get out of the house.
The biggest issue so far, however, has been pumping breast milk. In the beginning, (about 3 weeks pp) my goal was to just learn how to use the pump. I regretted not doing it sooner, since it was a lot simpler than I thought. (somehow the lactation cups and tubes looked very intimidating to me at first.) I have the Lansinoh Affinity pump and although I am glad I made the purchase, (it is about $200 less than the popular Medela pumps) I still have a love/hate relationship with it. Why?
1. Pumping is boring. You sit there for 10 minutes holding those cups to your boobs unable to do much else besides watch TV.
2. I feel like a cow. Something about seeing your nipples stretched into little plastic cones makes you feel the opposite of sexy.
3. There have been days (especially during growth spurts) where Cyrus is eating all day and I can't even pump an ounce.
4. I never know how much I am going to get. I so envy those women who have surplus milk. It's depressing when you sit there and pump for 10 minutes and only come away with an ounce of milk.
5. Inconvenient- There are only a few places I can pump and I ONLY feel comfortable pumping at home. Plus, I'm a fitness instructor. While teachers or corporate workers might be able to pump at work during breaks, I get 5 min. between each class and I am sure my clients would freak out if I had my boobies out and tried to pump while demonstrating lunges.
That being said here are the reasons I love it:
1. FREEDOM! Finally, someone else can feed the baby.
2. Although I am tempted to say "freedom" again (I mean, for a new mom that is huge) I love being able to give my son the best nutrition even when I can't be with him.
3. Sometimes it relieves engorgement quicker than my son can while nursing. After being gone for a few hours, I can usually pump two 3 oz. bottles in 10 min and still have enough milk to feed my son.
4. It helps increase my supply. By pumping at the end of every feeding, I can up my supply which helps especially during growth spurts.
I am so thankful that pumps are available, because it allows me to continue to breastfeed while still allowing me to spend time away from my baby. Still, its not that easy and I deeply respect women who pump the majority of their milk supply while at work. I have been stressing out about supply issues while pumping. I really hate being away from Cyrus for more that 3 hours since it is both uncomfortable (engorgement) and stressful (worrying about supply decrease). There was a time at about the 6 week growth spurt where I was really worried about my supply and I started to deplete my stash of frozen breast milk. I was really considering giving up on working, but after I started drinking Mother's Milk tea and pumping more often, my supply was up again and I am glad I have stuck with breastfeeding and working.
The time I spend away from my son, teaching fitness classes allows me to have a mental break. I always feel that I return to him with more focus and love. I think that being able to do what I love grounds me and being able to spend some time away from my son allows me to appreciate the time we have together more.
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